View your attorney as a paid professional rather than a friend or confidante. Women tend to be supportive and sensitive to the needs of others, to build bridges, and to “make nice.” These tendencies often get in our way during divorce. You have to insist on getting what you need and deserve. If you don’t, you’ll still be able to take care of yourself financially. Use this time of upheaval to start taking control of your life.When your grief is overwhelming, go home or to a friend’s house, not to your attorney, who is billing you at his normal hourly rate. Even if you hope that you will eventually be able to reconcile with your ex, don’t bend over backwards to make it happen. Vow never to worry in the dark—if you can’t sleep, turn on the light, pick up a pencil and paper, and write down your worries.Although Indiana is a “no-fault” divorce state, the Petition for Dissolution of Marriage must declare the appropriate grounds upon which the dissolution is being sought.

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These assets will remain yours as long as you can document them. Don’t overlook any assets—half of everything is yours!

Copies of your spouse’s business records can be a treasure map showing you where the hidden assets are buried. Even if you don’t want an asset, it can be used to trade for something you do want.

Make a clear copy of all tax returns, loan applications, wills, trusts, financial statements, banking information, brokerage statements, loan documents, credit card statements, deeds to real property, car registration, insurance inventories, and insurance policies.

Also, copy records that you can use to trace your separate property, such as an inheritance or gift from your family.

Don’t overlook hobbies or side businesses that might have expensive equipment or generate income. And, if there’s a chance that your past joint tax returns omitted income or overstated deductions, you may want to seek an indemnification clause to protect yourself if the IRS decides to audit. Also, taking an active role in the negotiations will help you to reach a better settlement than “letting the attorneys handle it.” You will have less conflict and litigation after the divorce, better compliance from your ex, and better sharing of information about the children. During this trying time, it’s easy to confuse your feelings with the facts.

If you have a PHT degree (Putting Honey Through), you might be entitled to some reimbursement for the cost of his tuition. Your attorney may give you legal advice, but all of the decisions are ultimately up to you. Try to be as dispassionate and businesslike as possible. Going through a divorce can sometimes make you feel like the captain of a leaky boat on stormy seas—there seems to be a new crisis at every turn.Remember: there’s nothing like new knowledge and a fulfilling career to bolster your self-esteem. Engage a forensic accountant if you think there might be hidden assets. Hire a divorce financial professional to help determine the best settlement options for you.Don’t skimp now on matters that will affect the rest of your life.However, Indiana is a no-fault state, meaning the court will also grant the parties a divorce on the grounds that there has been an irretrievable breakdown of the marriage, i.e. The court will make an award of maintenance from one spouse to the other in three circumstances.The first is if the court finds a spouse to be physically or mentally incapacitated to the extent that the ability of that spouse to support himself or herself is materially affected.Child support may not be adequate to cover the true costs of child rearing, and she might have lost many important years of career growth, making it difficult for her to get back on her feet after divorce. By familiarizing yourself with the twelve financial pitfalls of divorce, you can save yourself a lot of heartbreak—and hassle—in the future. Legal fees, court costs, therapist bills, new living expenses, and myriad other costs will drain your financial resources.